


I Am Not Programmed To Want

by rowandove



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Drabble, F/M, My First Series, What Have I Done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-06
Updated: 2019-03-23
Packaged: 2019-06-06 05:14:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15187571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rowandove/pseuds/rowandove
Summary: you and RK900 go out to meet some of your friends... it ends poorly





	1. Chapter 1

“ 900…900 wake up” You poke the still and silent RK900 unit. Trying to get his attention. He is staring straight ahead his LED blinking a yellow color. It takes a moment for him to acknowledge you.  
“ yes ma’am?” He responds, his voice monotone, but his ice blue eyes are staring down at you with a look of acknowledgement   
“Are you ready to go yet?” You asked. The two of you had someplace to be and you were getting impatient. But RK900 had an obligation to write reports to Cyber Life every 6 hours or so.  
He nodded and straightened out the collar on his jacket. The two of you were just going out to meet a few of your friends. You felt bad about having to drag an android with you, but you didn’t really have a choice. He was your bodyguard after all.   
Nearly every high profile Cyber Life employee had one these days. Ever since the android rebellion they were all very afraid to go out in public without someone, human or android it really didn’t matter, watching their back. While you didn’t work for Cyber Life your father did. 900 had been his idea in the first place and he would chew you out if he found out you left home without him.  
you walked down the street toward a local restaurant, one of your favorites. as you watched him scan the road for any and all threats you had to admit you really didn’t mind having him around all that much. his presence did make you feel safer. but then on the other hand, with all that had happened recently you were a little nervous around him too. RK900 wasn’t a deviant and your father assured you he could never be one… but he had been wrong before. he said the same thing about RK800.  
when you reach the door to the restaurant and try to open it 900 stops you. insisting that he go first with the usual politeness that comes with being an android.   
“ 9 i’m not completely helpless” you protest. laughing a little as you do. a small smile on your face. he returned the expression, or tried to at least. he had been trying so hard since that one day you told him he looked a little too intimidating. it made you laugh even more.  
the restaurant is near empty, that’s part of why you like it here so much. That and you know the owners son. you join your friends who are sitting at a high top table near the window.   
“ hey guys!! sorry i’m late. 9 had to file another stupid report” you say as you sit down.  
“ do you really have to lug that piece of plastic around wherever you go?” your friend Alex sneers at the android from across the table.  
you ignore the venom in his words. he hates 900. you don't know why exactly. but you can make a few guesses. nearly everyone you know has some reason to hate androids now. you don't, RK900 is a big reason for that. sometimes you worry and make jokes about how bad he is. but mostly you think he’s ok. he’s been better company than most. for now that’s enough for you.  
RK900 is wandering the nearly empty building now. he knows he isn’t wanted. so he tries to keep himself busy while you talk to your friends.   
your best friend Fey mercifully tries to change the subject “ So Alex, is your mom really gonna sell this place?” she asks. also not a fun subject, but there wasn’t much good going on in any of your lives right now.  
he nods “ not enough business….” he pauses. playing around with the food in front of him “ it closes for good at the end of the week”  
so that’s why he asked the two of you to come here? you might not get the chance to ever come back. the thought makes you sad. you love this place. before you had to drag 900 around with you everywhere you went you use to come here every weekend. even with 900 you still tried too. at first he had heavily protested. not really comfortable with letting you go anywhere you wanted. but as things began to calm down in Detroit he had lighted up a little bit.  
you look over at RK900, there is a lost puppy sort of look on his face as he explores the restaurant for the fifth time or so, and this gives you a chance to look around at the place one last time. its old, its been here since you were little. for about as long as you’ve known Alex, probably longer. your really going to miss this place.   
Alex pulls your attention back to him in a surprising way. his hand is suddenly on yours and he is rubbing his thumb across the back of your hand.   
“ your still gonna visit me after the place closes right?” he asks.  
you can only nod, the shock of this gesture keeping you from speaking. you don't like it. you like Alex, but not like that. you can see in his eyes that he intends it as more than a friendly gesture. its a look you’ve seen men give women at bars all the time.   
you pull your hand away angrily. what the fuck was he doing!?! “ Alex! what sort of signal did i give off that made you think that was ok?!” you snap loudly  
Alex starts to speak but stops when he sees something behind you. his brow furrows  
from behind you you hear a familiar monotone voice “ is there a problem Ma’am?” you want very much for the android to go away. you can handle Alex just fine yourself.  
“ fuck off!” Alex yells at 900. then he goes to grab your hand again. but the android is quicker. grabbing Alex’s wrist and crushing it in his cold plastic hand.  
“ 900! please! this really isn’t necessary” you protest. but he isn’t paying attention to you. Alex yelps in pain, but that only seems to make RK900 grip harder before he pulls him off the chair and onto the floor.  
you hop out of your chair and back up quickly. eager to get away from the violence. Alex uses his free hand to pull on 900′s jacket. pulling the android down onto the floor. what follows is a flurry of blows exchanged between the two men.  
you are shocked. how quickly everything had changed. the cliche nature of the situation wasn’t lost on you. but now having experienced it yourself you aren’t sure how some woman would want two men to fight over her.  
900 is faster, stronger, and probably smarter than Alex. so you're sure this will end poorly for your friend. is he your friend anymore? do you even want to be his friend anymore after what is happening in front of you?   
now 900 is on top of Alex. his hands around his throat. a strange, almost angry look in his eyes. you didn’t know he was capable of such a look, but you know it isn’t a good thing. you need to stop this now!  
“Nines, stop it!!” you yell as you run to try and pull the android off of Alex. something in your voice resonates with him now. he listens to you. slowly getting up off the ground while also keeping himself in between you and Alex. then you grab the sleeve of his Jacket pulling him away. out of the building, out of this situation, just out.  
the two of you stand in silence for a moment. despite the fact that your outside now you can still hear Alex swear as Fey tries to help him up off the ground. you allow a few tears to fall. this is way too much for you. you turn to the RK900, who is just standing there, watching you.  
“ what the fuck was that Nine?!?!” you half yell. your voice is shaking a little  
“ it is my function to protect you. i saw your discomfort and reacted” was his reply  
“ you almost killed him!!!”   
“i would not have done so. i am not programmed to kill unless absolutely necessary”   
his usual tone of voice does more to anger you than anything else. you look at him. dead in the eyes “ did you want too?”   
his expressionless face twitches a little as he processes the question “ you know i am not programmed to want things”  
you sigh. you know this. but sometimes you can't help but wonder if something else is going on in his head. something other than the mission.  
“ Y/N i’m glad your ok” he says quickly.  
you turn to walk away from him, trying your best to look like your still mad at him. but you really can't help yourself.your smiling now.  
The end


	2. (part 2) Want him to be there...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a little bit of the reader interacting with RK900 before i tear his programming apart in the next part!! its some fluff and some angst.

Rk900’s eyes shift from side to side as he looks at what you have in your hands. Your holding two turtle neck sweaters, one black and one red.  
“ i don't see why this is necessary Ma’am?”  
“ you are not wearing the same outfit every day for the rest of your life” you protest. Shoving the clothes into him. “ pick one already!”  
“ my cyberlife issued uniform is just fine.” he protests but he takes the clothes with him into another room anyway.  
He returns wearing the black one. You should have guessed he would never touch the red one. But at least he's not in that god awful cyberlife shirt and jacket.  
Today is supposed to be a relatively uneventful one. You had canceled your plans since they were with Alex and you and him were not on good terms right now. Your fine with not having any plans. Being alone doesn't bother you, and besides, you're not really alone. You have your cat Misha, and Nines as well. speaking of witch, 900 is sitting on the sofa patiently waiting for something to do, while your cat bats at the LED on his head. It's actually really adorable and you record it with the intention of showing your friends. Or at least your internet friends….since you aren't talking to your actual friends anymore…  
You plop down on the other end of the sofa rather dramatically and pull your laptop onto your lap. You might as well get some work done today. You have a copy of the code that makes up 900’s operating system up on your screen. It serves as the reference point for most of your coding and programming work. Not exactly legal...but cyberlife was turning a blind eye to it since RK900 wasn't exactly legal either. The government had forbidden cyberlife from creating any new models while they tried to handle the situation in detroit. That ban hadn't lifted yet and your pretty sure it never will.  
RK900 was the reference model for what would have been an entire line of RK900’s if RK800 had only succeeded in his mission. Now the android was your bodyguard, a pretty significant step down in purpose as far as your concerned. Nines doesn't seem to mind though, but then again he isn't programmed to, you forget about that sometimes.  
Since the incident with Alex yesterday you are eager to take a look at RK900’s data on the events. You could have just as easily asked him for it, but there was something about looking at the data on a screen that felt right to you.  
Before you is his own personal log of the days events. For the most part it is a list of executed programs and transcripted conversations between the two of you. It stays that way up until things took a turn for the worse last night. Underneath his log of your reaction to Alex’s advances is written.

SOFTWARE INSTABILITY….. ERROR RA9

Then the logs detailing the fight. Then this.

SOFTWARE INSTABILITY CORRECTED

It's a strange sight, to your knowledge Nines has never experienced a software instability before. They aren't exactly unheard of and they are suppose to self correct as this one seems to have, but too many in a short span of time is now thought to be what causes deviancy.  
You have to ask “ Nines...access any and all information on error RA9 for me”  
The android shakes his head “ Cyber Life has classified that error. “ his LED blinks yellow.  
“ well that's just wonderful!!” your voice is dripping with sarcasm. The thought that there might be something wrong with 900 is unsettling, but it's just one error. One error and you’ve known him for weeks now. You're probably just overreacting.  
You close the laptop and sigh “ 900 please inform me if you have any more instability errors.”  
“ yes Ma’am” he nods

There is a knock on your door and the doorbell rings. Nines gets up to answer it while you set the laptop down and get up. He walks back onto the room with Fey in tow…..she looks pissed.  
“Two ribs Y/N, he broke two of Alex’s ribs” Fey got right to the point. There was venom in her words.  
You aren't exactly sorry for what Nines did yesterday. Alex had been kinda a creep. Maybe he deserved a couple broken bones.  
“whatever” you scoff. Your still mad and you might regret this conversation later but right now you don't care.  
“ look i get he was an ass…” Fey crosses her arms “ but if you don't do something to fix it he probably wont ever speak to you again”  
You have to think a moment...do you care if you ever speak to Alex again? Yeah he had made an enormous mistake last night. But it's just one mistake that he has already pretty much paid for.  
“can you ask me again when i’m less mad?” you sigh. You still need some time to calm down.  
“i would love to…. But Alex doesn't want to let this go. You know how stubborn he is. He sent me here to convince you to meet with him tonight…. I fucking hate being the middleman in this. So i need you to say yes and get it over with”  
“ your fucking kidding me….Fey just go…. I’ll give you an answer later… right now i can't deal with this” it takes most of your energy not to yell at her. And you just need her to get out before you explode.  
She leaves with a huff. Honestly your so relieved she is gone you flop back onto the sofa and let out a long sigh.  
“You are not going...correct?” Nines finally speaks. He is looking down at you with those god damn eyes of his… its unsettling after what you just had to deal with.  
“I don't know… maybe i should….” you say even though you know exactly what Nines is about to respond with.  
“I don't think that's a good idea” There it is!! Right on queue! But there is an unsettling air around it as Nines “forgets” to use one of his social programs. The program that makes him move just a little bit when he’s standing still. It makes him seem more human and less machine. But he knows you hate it when he stops using it and that it will get him his way.  
You try your best to ignore that “well i don't really have much choice…. Alex wont leave us alone until i either tell him off or make up...i’m leaning toward the first option” you sigh “you can't go with me…”  
That strange, almost angry, look appears on 900’s face again “ why not?” he asks  
“ Because it will only make things harder...you know how he is. If i bring you its just going to end in another fight”  
“You sound like you wouldn't mind that” and he’s right. At least right now he is.  
“ oh shut up!” you yell “you can't go with me and thats final!” you walk away before he has a chance to protest again. Before you give in, because as much as you don't like to admit it you want him to be there even if it meant another fight.  
Maybe you're getting to comfortable around him. He’s only an android, yet you have begun to treat him more and more like a human. You feel safe around him. But that's his entire purpose isn't it? He was built to protect you, but then, why does it feel like more than that sometimes? You just saw it in his face. The almost anger you know for a fact isn't a programed emotional response.  
As you walk into your bedroom and shut the door you think ‘fuck it...maybe i need some time alone…’


	3. i want to be there

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nines doesn't want you out on your own. so when you decide to do just that, hes left alone with his own thoughts...and that may turn out to be a bad thing.

You’re meeting with alex is fast approaching. But Nines is cooking dinner anyway, even after you said you wouldn't be home to eat it. In his mind there is still some chance you’ll come to your senses and not go. He's preemptively writing the report in his head as well. It will probably go something along the lines of..”Y/N left home without me and then told a man off for making unwanted advances”. At least that's how 900 hopes it will go. Its short and to the point. Y/N’s father will probably yell at her for not taking Nines with her.  
You walk out into the kitchen dressed in as many layers as you could put on. Its cold out tonight and 900 would have said something if you hadn't done so.   
“ I'm leaving now. See you later Nines” there is a fake looking smile on your face as you look up at him. You're hoping he won't notice that your not exactly thrilled to be leaving.   
He returns the gesture with his own smile. Programmed and forced. Not genuine at all. Your pretty sure he's doing it to mock you. Is that in his programming? because of course he knows you don't really want to go. You said as much earlier today.  
“You still want to do this…?” he asks.  
“No...but I have no choice...and besides...its just Alex. He's my friend...what's the worst he could do?”  
Nines can think of 100 different things Alex could do to you. All of them bad, and all of them only possible because he won't be there to protect you, but he doesn't say anything. Your right after all. You and Alex have been friends for a long time. Much longer than the RK900 has known you for. He has no reason to really harm you.   
The android watches you walk through the door without another word to him. Now he's alone. The only other sounds are the purring of your cat who is stretched out on the floor in front of him, and the sizzle of bacon cooking on the stove.The bacon had been his idea of a trap to keep you from going. Hoping the promise of such a food would keep you here. But you hadn't even looked at it before you left.  
His LED pulses a yellow color. He replayed the day in his head a couple times. What could he have done to keep you here? Or at least convince you to take him along. His entire mission was to protect you, and right now he was failing that mission.   
SOFTWARE INSTABILITY... ERROR...RA9

He couldn't quite understand what was happening to his program, but it happened whenever something went wrong with the mission. He had no better word for it than a feeling. A feeling that something was wrong. That something other than his program was urging him forward. The same general goal...but for different reasons.  
Of course feeling was something he couldn't do. So that wouldn't be the right word. But the English language lacked a better one.   
ERROR CORRECTED….  
And just like that Nines is back to normal...sort of..he has a plan now. He’s going after you. It had taken him longer to sort out the conflicting orders than he would have liked, but he finally settled on the mission being more important than how much you liked him right now. Your going to hate him for this. If you find out...you don't need to know. After all, he just needs to be able to watch you. If nothing goes wrong it's likely you won't even know he is there.  
He grabs a jacket off the end of the sofa. Not the cyberlife issued one, that would get him noticed. He has a black leather jacket that you keep trying to get him to wear. it will make a great disguise for now. After he puts it on he looks at himself in the bathroom mirror. It fits well, he imagines you would call him handsome. But he’s a machine who couldn't care less about such things.  
Your cat protests adorably as he walks out the door. Your suppose to be meeting Alex at his home. Nines had been there once before...middle class...modest in comparison to how you lived...but that had never gotten in the way of your friendship. You never much cared how much money a person made. Their character was more important. Alex had been one such friend...until recently.  
On his way there Nines thought about the night he had gotten into a fight with Alex. Alex never liked Nines. That much was made clear when they first met over a year ago, before the RK900 had become your bodyguard. Back then he was just tasked with following you around. A test run of his social programing before his model went into full production. Done in secret of corse, against the wishes of cyberlife who at the time were dealing with the deviation of their RK800 model.  
900 had always thought Alex just didn't like androids, but as time went on, and especially now, it seems he might have just been jealous. Nines wasn't really sure why anyone would be jealous of him. He was just doing his job. He did only what he was programmed to do. Except he had not been programmed to nearly kill the human last night. Nines could have done dozens of other things that would have gotten you out of there without fighting Alex….Maybe he did really want to fight the human? No...that can't be it..  
Nines reaches the outside of Alex’s house. The lights are on and he can see the shadows of people moving. A quick look through a window provides him with all the information he needs. You and alex are just sitting in the living room and talking. Alex is laying on the sofa and not moving much. Its to be expected of someone who recently suffered several broken ribs. Nothing seems out of the ordinary. You don't look happy at all to be there but that was to be expected.  
Maybe it was a bad idea to come out here after all. Maybe he was overreacting...that would be a first. Nines had never done that before. But hell! He was out here in the dark peering into someone's home! If you found out you would probably have him deactivated.  
Nines needed time to think about the conflicting messages his program is generating, but he cant stay in alex’s front lawn. He picks a direction and starts walking.


	4. Want to live

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nines software instability is finally getting to him. He goes out to clear his head...it doesnt end well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **this chapter contains a near death experience involving a car accident**

Inside Alex’s home your sitting on the edge of the living room sofa. Alex is laying down on it looking up at you. The two of you had been talking about the past for a while. Trying to remember why you had been friends in the first place. Now you were getting to the important part...the whole reason you were here…  
“Nines may have overreacted last night...i’m sorry..” you say. Unable to look at Alex for a moment.  
“May have?!” Alex laughs...then groans in pain “he didn't have to break bones…”  
“I know….but he was only trying to protect me...you know how he gets sometimes.”  
“Well it's done already.” Alex sighs “tell me...what does he got that i don't?”  
Your mouth is hanging open. “Alex! It's not like that!”  
He shakes his head “don't think i don't notice how you look at him, if he were human you would be all over him…”  
“ALEX!” you yell, but your blushing a bit and that does take away from how angry you want to look. You like Nines, a lot, but he's not even a deviant.  
“Your not hard to read Y/n…...i just don't understand...why not me?”  
“I don't know….i really don't..I’m sorry Alex” you frown at him.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Nines made it all the way down the street before it dawned on him that he has no clue where to go. He’s never gone anywhere without a plan before. It's so unlike him. Against his programming, although he’s been going against his programming a lot recently. He wonders if it had something to do with the software instability he’s been experiencing, but even he doesn't fully understand what it means.   
He does know one thing...the mission he was built for isn't exactly the mission he's carrying out anymore, and that mission isn't exactly as straightforward as he thought it would be. Maybe it would be easier if he knew exactly what it was now, but he’s not even sure of that. He can feel it sometimes. Something going on in the background that his diagnosis software cant see.   
He’s run his diagnosis program twice since he left the house and he still doesn't know why he’s out here anymore. Telling himself he wanted to protect you isn't working anymore. That's not why he’s out here….well, not entirely. 

There's a bright light...then a crashing sound, and suddenly he’s on the ground. Face down in a pool of his own blue blood. A countdown timer shows up. Partially blocking his vision with the amount of time he has left to live, It's not long. He should have seen it coming. He had walked right into the path of a 4 door sedan while deep in thought. Stupid!! He was Stupid! How could he let this happen! How could he let his guard down like that!  
He was angry at himself, but anger was an emotion..wasn't it? Was he feeling things? If he was….well it didn't matter much now. He was about to shut down, but then it dawned on him. He no longer lives in a world where deviant androids can just come back from the dead after they are damaged. And if he was feeling this he was a deviant. He was surprised at how easy it had been to accept that fact, but that might be partially because his systems are shutting down.  
Nines is one of a kind. The only working RK900 since the revolution. So there was absolutely no chance he would come back unless this body was repaired. That was unlikely.  
At this point...several humans surrounded him...some of them looked horrified, concerned….they looked like they wanted to help. but nines was damaged beyond help. nobody could save him now. he was sure of that...he didn't really think he deserved to be saved anyway...you could get another bodyguard….Nines was replaceable… even if he already knew you wouldn't want to replace him.  
He had heard that deviants were afraid to die, and though he did not want to die he wasn't at all afraid of it. Was he a deviant then? he had loads of evidence for and against this. He wasn't sure anymore, a first for him, and not the only first he experienced today. One of the humans hovering over him has a recognizable face. Every android knows exactly who Elijah Kamski is, and he's standing right in front of Nines. Examining the android as if he intended to do something, Nines wasn't sure what, and he wasn't going to be around long enough to find out.  
Slowly his vision turns black...and there was nothing...


End file.
